Here we are, one month and some change shy of 2011 and as of yet, I haven’t managed to eat my way to super skinny and fabulous. You would think that by this point I would have just given in to all of my size 8, Latina curves and va-va-voom-ness but quite frankly, I’d prefer a bit more flatlands on this body than all of these mountains (i.e. the bubbies and my derrière). Sure, I could have exercised myself into a nonexistent dress size but my list of excuses weighed down my ample butt. Now the holiday invites are quickly multiplying in our mailbox and the angst of choosing the perfect dress for all of these extravaganzas has me completely flummoxed. The husband, thankfully, doesn’t have these issues because he can wear anything he wants and still look like my Mr. McDreamy but this isn’t about him. Let’s get back to my dilemma. =)
So, do I go short and leggy? This dress would require my thighs to undergo a rigorous treatment of love whacks and pat-downs of a rolling pin. Perhaps I exaggerate but a few thigh treatments at the spa may be in order if I go this route. These legs MUST be up to snuff before I sashay my sassy self in this little confection of loveliness.
Do I go long and svelte? This sleek number would require the – ahem – TWINS to climb up onto a stepladder and harness themselves up and out in order to keep them in saluting formation. Hmmm…maybe I can squeeze in a ‘bubbie’ appointment for a slight tuck and lift before the fiesta countdown. Heh!
Or do I go camouflage ‘caliente’ in this simple but spicy little treat? This may be just the ticket to hide any unsavory pooch puffs.
Sigh. No matter how I go about this process, just getting to the “WOW” will be no picnic.